Problem Management
by superschade
Summary: Armin and Berthold contemplate one of the most stressful problems known to teenage boys: the teenagers that are not boys.


_When I was explaining the training arc of the series to a friend of mine, she said, "Huh. Sounds a lot like the Jewish summer camp I go to." So, I thought, let's make it like Jewish summer camp, then. And then this happened..._

_**Disclaimer:** I do not own Attack on Titan/SnK. If I did, I would have Armin Ber-tell Berthold what Reiner Ber-told him about Annie's ass and get amusement out of the subsequent smackdown. Also, I would have a definite spelling of Berthold's damn name, instead of having to call friends in Germany and ask how they would spell it. _

* * *

Though they had admittedly little in common with each other, the one thing shared indisputably between Armin Arlert and Berthold Hoover was their mutual and unfortunate incompetence. Certainly, both young men possessed great and unique talents that set them apart from their peers: Armin, ever bright and brainy, excelled in tactics and intelligence and frequently rendered his instructors speechlessly impressed with the sharpness of his mind; Berthold, despite his long and lanky frame, proved to be quick and nimble in his maneuver gear but sturdy and reasonably powerful as a hand-to-hand combatant. Yet, for all of their efforts as trainees, Armin could not escape notice for his poor performance in physical assessments, while Berthold, conversely, usually escaped notice entirely despite his towering frame.

So, in light of their supposed inadequacies as soldiers-in-training, small, bubbly and feeble-bodied Armin and tall, dark and introverted Berthold were drawn to each other, and the two quickly became friends.

Although Armin remained steadfast in his closeness with Eren Jaeger, and Berthold with Reiner Braun, both Eren and Reiner possessed an innate primitivism that could only be expressed through raw power, while neither Armin nor Berthold took fancies to that type of behavior. It became a tradition, then, for the two of them to climb up to their top bunks and talk about a topic of interest in the few minutes before lights out while the other boys in the dormitory remained on the ground floor.

They soon got to know each other well, holding discussions on topics covering everything from whether or not they believed that the evacuation plans in case of another wall breach were drafted in favor of the people or of the king, to what their favorite foods from their hometowns were. They valued each others' intelligence and eloquence, and they grateful for the nuanced conversations that they were able to hold; but, on some nights, they just talked about the things that any of their peers would, albeit more placidly.

Armin, seated with his legs curled beneath him, peered cautiously over the railing of his bunk at the commotion below, where the other boys were fighting each other with their pillows. "Gosh… If they don't stop soon, Shadis is going to make us all run laps until sunrise," he murmured, wincing as he watched Connie Springer topple over after taking a wallop square in the face. "Like the time when someone put a frog down Jean's pajama pants."

Tucking his knees closer into his chest, Berthold tried to hide a smile behind them. "Yeah, but I have to admit hearing that squeal in the middle of the night was kind of funny..."

"It really was, wasn't it?" Armin laughed. "Though, I could have done without him yanking off his pants in the middle of the floor." He suddenly gasped and recoiled quickly as a pillow whizzed by his head, narrowly missing his cheek. "Guys, be careful!"

"Sorry, Armin!" Eren shouted back, defending his face with an outstretched arm. "You and Berthold should come down here, though! It's fun!"

"I think I'll pass." Rolling his eyes, Armin sighed in exasperation. "Really, if he keeps this up and gets a black eye or something, Mikasa's going to put us through an interrogation even worse than the first-day initiation to find out who did it."

Berthold's eyes widened. "Really? Even though it's just a pillow fight? I mean, I've heard Eren talk about how she tries to protect him too much, but I just thought that Eren was just…well, being Eren."

Glancing quickly at Eren, who had taken to exchanging whomps with Thomas, Armin smiled. "That's just Eren being Eren, I think," he said, lowering his voice slightly so that Eren wouldn't hear. "I guess you could say that Mikasa looks out for him a lot more than he may need, but he should be happy to have someone care so much about him."

"I guess so," Berthold agreed, although somewhat distantly. "I wouldn't want to be one to cross Mikasa, though. From what I've seen her do in training, she's definitely one of the deadliest fighters among all of us trainees."

"Oh, yeah, for sure," Armin agreed. "Mikasa has always been great at fighting, ever since we were kids. I've seen her take down a ton of the guys here during combat exercises, and I don't think any of the girls can match her for power." He tilted his head thoughtfully. "Well, except maybe Annie. Annie seems like she's really strong too."

"A-Annie?" As if stung by a hornet, Berthold started and looked around anxiously as if he expected her to appear suddenly. Then, realizing what he was doing, his olive cheeks flooded with color. "Annie Leonhart, you mean?"

"Y-yeah," Armin said slowly, perplexed by Berthold's bizarre reaction. "I've never gone up against her in practice, even though we're in the same weight class, but I've seen her throw Eren and Reiner around a few times. Even Reiner, and he's a foot taller than her and twice as large!" He shook his head in disbelief and turned slightly pink. "It's so embarrassing, but I'm fairly certain that if I ever went up against her, I would be knocked out before I could breathe."

Shrinking back even more into his own posture, Berthold looked down at his knees as he spoke. "I don't know. I haven't f-fought with her either, but I think she would be able to take me down pretty easily, too. N-not that I would be able to bring myself to fight her or anything, even if they asked me to… I mean, I don't really know her that well, but I don't think she's the kind to pick a fight if she's not provoked, and in fact she seems like she's actually a nice person—

Seeing Armin stare blankly at him, Berthold immediately clamped his mouth shut as he became aware that he was babbling almost incoherently, his face burning hotter and hotter by the second. Armin, however, proved to be infallibly keen, and after a moment or two of observing Berthold's behavior, his large blue eyes lit up.

"Don't tell me," he said slowly, excitement spreading steadily across his face, "don't tell me that you have feelings for Annie, Berthold?"

Berthold said nothing and buried his face in his knees, his skin flushed dark crimson by then. His response, or lack thereof, rather, only served to confirm Armin's suspicion, who laughed gleefully. Grinning, he gently poked at Berthold's arms, which were tightly bound around his shins.

"I would never have guessed it, especially since I've never really seen the two of you talk or anything, though," Armin mused, trying to coax Berthold out from behind his kneecaps. "Do you two get paired up for a lot of exercises or for cleaning duty or something?"

"Well, no, not really…" Sighing, Berthold's face finally emerged from his knees but he kept his gaze fixed on his own feet. "To be honest, I've hardly ever said anything to her since coming here, and I don't really see that changing any time soon."

"You can't know that for sure," insisted Armin. "Why don't you try talking to her sometime? Make small talk, you know, about training or the food here or something? I know that Annie isn't the most verbose of the trainees, but surely she won't kick your legs out from under you just for saying hello…"

Pursing his lips, Berthold shook his head once. "I've never been good at that kind of thing…polite chit-chat and the like… And, well… A-Annie…again, I don't think she's a mean person, really, but she's not the most approachable person either. She prefers to be left alone, usually; she's always been like that…"

"'Always'?" Armin repeated, surprised. "Did you know Annie before coming here?"

"N-no!" This time, Berthold shook his head more violently, the blush rushing back into his cheeks. "I mean, not really. I saw her every now and then when we were first brought into Wall Rose after the breach, but I wouldn't say that counts as knowing her. I just remembered seeing her face in the crowds when we were lined up for rations a few times, so I was really surprised when I saw her face again, here, on our first day as trainees…"

He trailed off into silence, shrinking back into his embarrassment again. Amused, Armin watched his friend being taken over by shyness for a moment before leaning back on his arms, smiling.

"A face that you couldn't forget, huh?" he teased, and chuckled as Berthold noticeably tried to keep himself from rolling his eyes. "I can't say that I blame you, though; she may not smile a lot, but Annie's still rather pretty. N-not that I'm interested in her like _that_," he said hastily, seeing the crestfallen expression on Berthold's face. "I mean, I think that Mikasa's pretty, too, but I can't see her as anything other than a sister to me." Armin scratched his nose awkwardly, this time being the one to turn a light shade of pink. He cleared his throat.

"I think you should try talking to her more."

"Really? But how…?"

"Hm…" Armin tilted his head thoughtfully. "You could approach her at dinner and ask her about her day, or you could offer to spar with her to give her some practice with opponents who are much larger than her."

"Armin…"

"Sorry, that was kind of farfetched. Even so, you could still ask her about her fighting style. She seems to like demonstrating it to people, and you could go to her for some advice about defensive moves."

"Maybe…"

Armin shifted, crossing his legs under him, and leaned forward. "Whatever you say, you should just try to become friends first. After that, you'd be surprised at how well things go if she likes being in your company. Trust me."

Berthold looked taken aback. "Are you sure? You've tried this before?"

"Yes, and I… I mean…Well, I, um…a long time ago, I knew this girl in Shiganshina…"

"Huh? Girl in Shiganshina?" Eren clambered up the ladder to his own bunk with Reiner following closely at his heels; the pillow fight had concluded down below. His hair stuck out in every direction, small clusters of feathers clinging to the brown tufts. "Are we talking about the girl who kissed Armin when he was, like, eight?"

"H-hey, Eren! You can't just say that!" Armin gasped, growing increasingly flustered.

"Yeah, Eren, you can't just say that," Reiner echoed, plunking himself down next to Berthold. "I want to hear more about this. Say more."

"N-no!"

"See, Armin had a thing for this girl in our class when we were little—"

"Eren! Stop it!"

"Come on, Armin, lighten up! Anyway, word got out about it and she started hanging around him more after that. And then, as rumor has it…" Eren snickered at Armin's high-pitched protests, waggling his eyebrows. "They say that she kissed him on the mouth under the bridge at the river, and he was so surprised that he dropped his books in the water—"

"Eren!"

"—which was sad enough by itself, but then apparently Armin also fell in the water—"

"_Eren!_"

"—and came down with a fever that pretty much killed any chances of romance," Eren finished, casually blocking the frantic swats Armin was peppering him with. "Really unfortunate," he sighed, "because they would have made a nice couple, maybe."

"Wow," Reiner said with a snort, "I didn't think you had it in you, Armin. Way to go."

"Not you too, Reiner…"

"Right, though?! He looks so innocent, but…"

"Guys, stop it…"

"Hey, Armin, I bet the girls here really dig smart guys."

"Yeah, you could become the biggest heartbreaker in the 104th trainee corps!"

"…Berthold, please say something. Please!"

"I, um…"

"Even Berthold sees that you're a regular lovemeister, Armin."

"…I think I'm going to go to bed now…"

"Aw, come on, Armin…"

Rolling his eyes, Armin shook his head as Eren and Reiner continued to laugh and jab each other with their elbows. As he crawled towards his own bunk, he lowered his voice when he passed Berthold.

"I promise I won't tell anyone," he murmured, "but I still think you should try to talk to her more." He gave his friend a small smile. "I'll be rooting for you."

Berthold blinked. "T-thanks, Armin…"

A minute later, while all the boys scrambled to be in their bunks before Keith Shadis burst in to call lights out, Berthold remained sitting on his bunk, mulling over their conversation. Surely, he hadn't known Armin very long, but he felt a strange sense of relief for having told this secret to his curious but conscientious friend. Whether bound by incompetence or not, he found that he could trust Armin; in turn, Armin had placed trust in Berthold as well.

The two boys were a strange and unexpected pair of friends, but they seemed to work out well enough. For now.

* * *

_**A/N:** Yes, I have read the entirety of the manga and I know what happens following where the anime ended; the Berthold I wrote in this story is purely the Berthold that was portrayed in the anime, not the Berthold that we get to know in the manga (I'll avoid spoilers here). Say what you want to about Berthold, but I rather like him in both adaptations of the story... I got the idea for this from the character book, which says that these two are close friends even though we never really see that in series, and even more from Chapter 49, when Armin is the only one who can get to Berthold (again, no spoilers, but you'll know if you read it). _

_This was a weird fic to write, especially for SnK, but it's more fluff that I'm picking out of my brain before I can get down to real business. Thanks for reading! xx_

_**P.S.** I realize it's a bit OOC, but come on, how **adorable** is it to think that, out of all the studly cadets in their corps, Armin was the first one to have been kissed when he was younger. Be honest, now. It's totally cute._


End file.
